#like yes my car doesnt have remote start.....yes it takes 5 minutes to even start blowing hot air

[athousandsuns2010]

sitting in your car waiting for it to warm up is one of the most humbling experiences

[gaygwenpool]

*slams fists on table* MYSTELEON

I knew you wouldnt disappoint! :D  tho you already know most of these lmaoo  lotsa credit to @herbofoo anyway, i dont remember which of these you came up with but Patchwork wouldnt be the same without your Good Good Content! (And of course thanks for all your patience as i cry about comics lmao)

I’ve lost all shame long since ive started shipping them so brace yourself for the self-indulgent cheese that is Chameleon/Mysterio in my Patchwork verse. (its reallly. really Melodramatic. i gave up all pretense.. also under the cut cuz its long..)

ask meme

Who cooks:

Mysterio! Although Chameleon is objectively The Superior Cook thanks to the long years of being a servant to picky russian nobility BUT exactly because of that, he really doesnt enjoy it, even less when cooking for others and not just himself. So it is usually Beck who prepares meals (that are not bad either, they are just simpler) but as often as they can, they eat out. That said, Cham is very well aware Quentin loves his cooking so sometimes, he makes them something. (Being sick isnt so bad when it means Chammy bringin you a big bowl of hot borscht :)

On the other hand, Cham has quite a sweet tooth which Q notices Fast and decides to learn how to bake. It took more effort and failed tries than it could have, mostly because he got cocky, how hard could this be and just. kept forgetting he put stuff in the oven.. But now he makes quite delicious cookies n cakes which make Dmitri almost tear up because tasty + Quentin baked something Specifically for him?? 

Who does the laundry and other chores:

Mysterio’s laundry is usually booby trapped so he has to clean it himself and he doesnt even let Cham near it. And he keeps forgetting gadgets in his civvies. Not to mention that again, for the same servant reason, Cham really doesnt enjoy house chores in general, so he usually just gets his own clothes cleaned somewhere else (especially since his fancy suits and even fancier gowns are the highest quality and delicate materials, he doesnt even Know how to clean them..) 

As for the rest of the chores, its pretty balanced, although Cham has more of an eye for things that needs to be cleaned up (and Beck already has cooking duties) so he does a tad more. 

How many children do they have + Any pets:

In my Patchwork universe there’s a whole Thing about Leon, the Chameleon of the Ultimate universe but I’ve tried to type up a short summary and failed, it’s a long story lmao ^^;; and anyway he isnt exactly their kid, he is just much younger than them and they ended up sorta mentoring him. 

However, they have Celavi, the escaped ex-spy beluga.(Yes, it started as a joke based on this post that accidentally grew more and more serious until @herbofoo and me were too attached to let it go) She counts pretty much as their adopted daughter that they both spoil to hell and back, I mean no surprise, she saved Cham’s life once and sometimes, she helps out with heists. (Mostly for the show, you should have SEEN the look on Spider’s face when a beluga splashed him. He is used to humanoid sharks, to Hydroman.. not like. real life beluga that LAUGHS at him) Beck’s voice: “Dont you dare to insult her, SHE IS PERFECT AND FLAWLESS and A GOODNESS INCARNATE!! -she is literally a deserted russian spy that was trained to gather everything that could be used to harm USA-yea, i have a soft spot for those ;)“

She was always surprisingly clever so she never really counted as a “pet” and at one point, she even bonds with a symbiote (together they are Vague, again long story ah ha). They dont talk but have quite some range of vocalisations so communication isnt a problem. 

Who’s more dominant: 

They both have pretty dominant strong personalities (ok chameleon’s a bit more complicated with that but like.) with big egos who dont like others questioning their superiority. (Of course not at the level of like Doc Ock etc, they are surprisingly flexible and good team players that can be willing to let someone else take the spotlight if they are Nice) But the whole point of their relationship is that neither of them is dominant over the other, they get enough of that literally everywhere else. It’s very reassuring to be so sure that they are on equal footing, cooperating, no hidden nooses around their neck. Especially in their line of work of course! 

(Also, for the other interpretation of this question: anythin remotely sexual happens Pretty Late in the story and both of them are somewhere on the ace spectrum so it doesnt happen that often but they are both verses tho Beck bottoms more)

Favorite nonsexual activity:

MOVIES!! Sprawled on the giant comfy couch, closer than technically needed, cuddling and watching old movies with great special effects and/or great actors! Listening to Beck excitedly rant through the most dramatic speech of the story as he explains how the next cliffhanger is done with hydraulics! Focusing so hard on the stars in his eyes and his excited tone and gestures and just the tone of his voice you forgot to listen to the words themselves! Watching Cham’s face flawlessly mimic the faces on the screen in a blink of an eye and secretly guessing which one will he pick next. Feeling his head slowly fall on your shoulder, eyes closed, his mask smooth but not tense, instead just.. peaceful. Slight ping of annoyance, after all, this is A Classic movie dammit, but it’s gone in a second because Mitya hasnt slept since thursday and you are just relieved he is finally getting his rest. Feeling his warmth under your hand on his shoulders and suddenly never ever wanting to get up again.. EHM. anyway

PLANING HEISTS TOGETHER!! and more or less successfully executing them but planning is actually even more fun aside from the Big Reveals and Entrances which are actually harder to coordinate than one would think! 

Lots of shobiz/job talk actually, they really enjoy what they do! Lots of people already mentioned that in their hc compilations but i agree, they love goin to see all kinds of movies and plays and performances as well as acting various scenes with one another!  

Their favorite place to be together:

NEW YORK CITY BABEYY. Sure they love to travel and see other countries (and cause mayhem there) but.. they love their mess of a city, it’s never the same without the webhead around as well as the bazillion of other heroes n villains bashin each other’s heads. 

Any traditions:

Oh so many pop culture references and inside jokes, oh my god. One time, they spent the entire heist (and its planning period) speaking strictly in famous movie lines and titles, Max and other sixers tried to join but didnt last too long :’D 

Beck also has a habit of taking pictures of people with Interesting faces or styles he sees and sends them to Cham. Also another fanon classic: together they have a running game, disguising themselves as moderately famous people and the other guessing who..

Their “song”:

‘This is me’ from the Greatest Showman, i just live for the two of them singin it in Cham’s car,off key but fully immersed and living it. 

What they do for each other on holidays:

Neither of them are religious but that doesnt stop Beck from going ALL OUT at any opportunity, Sin Six doesn’t do any heists around holidays because you Know he’d make them dress for the occasion or worse, write them themed lines…  They still meet for Christmas and Hanukkah and sometimes other holidays too because this is my AU and you can pry festivities-related shenanigans from my cold, cold hands. It’s always at Beck’s place tho because he can turn his hideout into the tackiest holiday-themed showcase but he aint roping them into it.  

On the other hand, Cham despises American commercialized holidays in general and Christmas time especially, since it’s not a big thing in Russia and  also once again, he has family issues for days. (Although relatively speaking, he is pretty over these, he is not gonna like mope around or anything) 

Anyway, what they do for each other is that they try to compromise, Dmitri doesnt sneer at stupid kitsch decorations every 5 minutes and Quentin ..chills a little. :’D To be fair, Beck makes everything fun and having Cham there makes Beck appreciate the details more instead of just goin into BETTER!BIGGER! frenzy.

Where did they go for their honeymoon:

After the fuckin Ages of pinning, when they finally end up together for realsies, they wanted somethin Big and Flashy! (Well Beck wanted and Cham kinda too but also with the option to merge with the crowd unnoticed and take some chill time) Anyway they went on a whole world wide tour! Starting with a luxury cruise, they took their time, lots of crime sprees to plan and execute, lots of local shows to see, lots of dumb heroes to fool, they’re gonna have it all! 

Where did they first meet:

Around the time when Cham and Hammerhead had their criminal empire running Fisk to the ground, Otto decided the Sin Six should team up with them for their ressources needed on one heist or something. They agreed but Cham insisted on actually going in the field, it’s been a while since he really stretched his face legs like this and the mafia life was starting to bore him. Doc made him team up with Mysterio much to the fishbowl’s dismay because why do they need another disguise artist?? He is the Master Of Illusions dammit, he can run circles around this guy, what the fuck Otto?? So at the start, he pouts and fumes under his helmet and in general he is his v unpleasant self but… He can’t help but notice that the new guy is a real professional, he even uses Traditional masks, he likes the same movies… And most importantly, he is actually interested in Mysti’s craft, asking questions and even LISTENING to his long winded answers… At one point he even wondered if that X thing was meant as a HOMMAGE to the Y movie, the Six never did that!! (Usually the rest of the sixers dont know the reference, heathens, and when they do, they mock him for it, that he’s copying ideas and mixin them ridiculously.  BUT THIS GUY GETS IT!!) So it doesn’t take long for them to hit it off, of course at this point without any real Trust behind it but it’s a start. 

(Though Beck does pay a visit to Otto like, buddy pal i know you’ve been planning on manipulating these crimelords to your end somehow and honestly, any other day i’d be down, i actually had a robot prepared for my own backstab but i was thinking they werent that bad and maybe we Could hold our end of the bargain this time and just. leave each other on good terms? Mabye? Obviously it’s purely out of respect for our teammate Kraven since him and Chameleon seem to have some history, nothing more, definitely nothing to do with how bright Cham’s eyes were when i was showing him the back of my stage… ) 

What do they fight over:

this whole post has been a mountain of cheese but im bringing more! Honestly, goin through my notes on Patchwork, their biggest arguments have always been about.. the other one not taking proper care of himself :’D Or them lashing out because they were scared and worried about the other and they cant stand being so vulnerable while the other pretends it’s not a big deal because they dont know how to handle genuine concern directed at them. 

Do they go on vacations, if so where:

GIVE!!! BECK!!!! HIS!!!! ISLAND!!!!!!They actually do have one, it’s where Celavi spends most of the time and they visit her often. But never for too long, neither of them can actually spend too long doing nothing.. 

[themoneybuff-blog]

18 Two-Minute Chores to Tackle Right Away

All too often we explain away our lifestyle or money messes by saying, I just dont have time to do [whatever would have prevented the problem]. Heres a simple, supremely effective tactic: Any time something can be done (or at least well-begun) in two minutes or less, then for heavens sake, do it! The two-minute rule cant fix everything in our lives. But applying it helps to keep chores and paperwork from piling up quite so high. Every time a little thing doesnt add to the big things, our lives get better. More to the point, a small block of time can result in ongoing dividends. For example, shopping apps can get you discounts, cash back, or even refunds if a price drops. Downloading apps like Ibotta, Earny, Shopkick, Paribus, or Cartwheel gives the chance to both save and earn money when shopping for essentials and treats alike. Some of the tips in this article are simple productivity hacks. Others could completely change your financial life. All take just a couple of minutes at a time, and will move you further along the road to financial security. 1. Pay attention to your accounts. Personal finance author Beverly Harzog checks her credit card accounts every morning. It takes very little time, says the U.S. News & World Report columnist, and is a great way to catch fraud in the early stages. Dont want to check every day? Let the account tell you, by setting up an alert. Ask the bank or credit union to let you know when a bill has been paid or a debit card is used, or have the credit card company flag any transactions over a certain amount. Or over any amount, maybe: Jim Wang of WalletHacks.com has his card alert him to every. Single. Transaction. Yes, he really did set the alert amount to $0.00. You hear all these stories of people getting ripped off in $5 and $10 amounts because they dont notice, Wang says. These alerts let you know immediately that somethings wrong. The sooner you report fraud, the fewer losses a card issuer has to eat and remember, the cost of fraud gets passed along to all consumers eventually. 2. Order a free credit report. Are you checking your credit report often enough? You can do it for free three times a year (once for each of the major credit reporting bureaus) by visiting AnnualCreditReport.com. Requesting one report every four months can prevent small issues from becoming big ones. For example, if the report says you missed a payment but you really didnt, write to the credit bureau and get this fixed. Or perhaps theres an account on there that you didnt open. That could be a simple mistake but it could also be a sign of fraud. 3. Consider credit monitoring. Depending on what kind you choose, a credit monitoring service will do things such as check for account applications (bank, phone, credit, utilities) made in your name, provide identity theft insurance, monitor your personal information across thousands of databases, and alert you if there are any changes to your credit report or score. Some of these services are even free, such as Credit Karma and Credit Sesame. Personal finance writer Cameron Huddleston says one such alert clued her in to a drop in her credit score. Turns out she had a payment that she didnt realize was late. I quickly fixed the problem and raised my score in the process, says Huddleston, life and money columnist for GOBankingRates. 4. Set up automatic payments. If youre confident youll always have enough in your checking account, put your bills on auto-pay and let them take care of themselves. No more missed payments! Not everyone can (or wants to) keep that much in checking from month to month, though. Due to the hectic nature of life, Lee Huffman of the Bald Thoughts blog suggests setting up payment for at least the minimum amount each month. You can still pay bills in full manually, but setting an automatic minimum means no more late fees, ever. 5. Download your banks mobile app. Having your phone talk to your bank makes it easy to check account alerts wherever you are. Some apps offer other perks, such as letting you deposit checks remotely rather than having to drive to the bank (big time-saver) or letting you make person-to-person payments (helpful for stuff like chipping in on a shared utility bill or reimbursing a friend who picked up the tab at dinner). 6. Look into student loan refinancing. Some scholars graduate with scary amounts of debt. Figuring out whether to refinance your student loans is a complex subject, since its based on individual circumstances. However, refinancing could also change your life, if only by getting you out of default and on track to a solution. To find out more about whether its right for you, see Student Loan Consolidation: Pros and Cons. 7. Set up automatic savings. If you dont already have an emergency fund, this is a great way to get started. It shouldnt take more than two minutes to log into your bank or credit union account and set up a recurring monthly (or weekly) transfer into a separate emergency fund. Set it and forget it. Or maybe youre aiming for other kinds of savings: a pay cash for the next car fund, a 529 plan for your kid, or a pot of money that youll funnel into real estate or some other investment. No matter what kind of savings youre aiming for, be sure to make the amount sustainable. Specifically, dont commit every non-budgeted penny, because life brings surprises that take you over budget. 8. Deal with the mail. Dont throw it onto the table or desk because its mostly junk anyway. Take two minutes to weed through the junk and toss it into the recycle bin or trash. Otherwise, the pile of untended mail gets bigger and bigger, and you run the risk of missing something. For example, if a bill gets hidden in the stack and doesnt get paid, youll incur a late fee, and maybe even a ding on your credit report. (Yes, some of us do still get bills in the mail.) Bonus: Less clutter = less irritation. A tidy living space is very calming. And speaking of tidiness 9. Try some stealth cleaning. Choose a chore that can be done within two minutes. Vacuum one room. Move the laundry from the washer to the dryer. Clean a toilet. Scoop the cats litter box. Carry the trash out to the garbage can or dumpster. This works best if every member of the household takes on a daily two-minute task. Even toddlers can dust, and preschoolers can empty the bathroom trash or carry dishes to the sink. Little by little your living space will get tidier and youll feel better. In the best-case scenario, youll get in the zone and do two or three such chores. Now: Take the money you were considering putting toward a weekly housecleaning and use it for something that advances your personal financial goals. 10. Contact your insurance agent. Sometimes life changes or home upgrades make you eligible for discounts on your insurance policy. Keep your agent updated by e-mail or phone if, say, youve started to carpool (or to work from home), or if you had a home security system installed. Even if nothing changes, get in touch with your agent to ask about other potential discounts. For example, a decent-enough price break for taking a driving course might be worth the cost of the class. Should your credit report or your teen drivers report card improve noticeably, see if that will improve the premium. Still not convinced youre getting the best deal? Then you should 11. Comparison shop for insurance. You can fill out an online quote form in just a couple of minutes and the results might really surprise you. The Simple Dollars insurancearticles can help you understand the different kinds of coverage and find a lower rate. That way you can buy exactly what you need, vs. paying for products that dont support your financial goals. While youre at it 12. Comparison shop for credit cards, too. Some people dislike the current credit scoring system, and in a sense theyre right. Why should they be penalized for paying cash? But its what we have, and a smart consumer will learn to work within it. Thats why if you dont have a credit card, you should get one to build your credit score. It could also be invaluable in case of the unexpected; twice Ive had to drop everything and fly thousands of miles for family emergencies, and having plastic made that much, much easier. And if youve already got a credit card? Make sure youre getting the optimum benefits. Whether youre looking for travel rewards or cash back bonuses,The Simple Dollars credit card section lays it all out for you. 13. Schedule some maintenance. Keeping on top of the manufacturers suggested maintenance on everything from vehicles to home heating systems means preventing problems versus trying to fix them. A friend drove her car for nearly 22 years that way. Dont neglect your own maintenance, either. For starters, see the dentist twice a year. Annual medical exams arent always necessary, but talk with a primary care physician about whether you should at least have lab work done plus any other tests appropriate to your age (e.g., mammogram or colonoscopy). Not only is it cheaper to fix a health issue caught early, it can sometimes be a matter of life and death. 14. Keep an ongoing grocery list. If you use almost all of the remaining toilet paper, cat food, toothpaste, or whatever, add it to the online shopping list right then and there. Dont use online shopping? Add it to the paper list stuck on the fridge. Because you probably wont remember that you need cilantro, cat food, or whatever else when youre at the grocery store later and might find yourself at a convenience store at 10 p.m., grumbling and paying a ridiculous amount of money for TP. 15. Cancel a subscription. Are you even reading those magazines? How often do you go to the gym? Did your kids excitement over monthly craft kits peak at oh, about four months in? Do you really need regular deliveries of makeup, clothing, or snacks? Most people probably have a subscription or two that they never got around to canceling, says Austin Grandt of the Financial Toolbelt website. Apps like Trim and Truebill will corral your current subscriptions, making it easy to weed through what you really want. Remember: These things are generally wants, not needs. And they can cost a lot more than you might imagine. 16. Get a library card. It might take you two minutes to find out whats required in your area, such as photo ID and a current utility bill, and then another two minutes to get a librarian to set you up. Totally worth it! Libraries buy books and movies and subscribe to magazines so you dont have to. Depending on where you live, the library might also lend out everything from toys to art to fishing gear. Libraries offer information on genealogy, social services, and other useful stuff, too. (The main library in my city houses the Cooperative Extension Service.) Many host a wide variety of activities, including but not limited to childrens story hours, public lectures, movie nights, clubs, resume-building workshops, tax help, and film appreciation nights. Most if not all of these things will be free. 17. Set things up before bed. Before you turn in, ready your breakfast supplies. When you stumble into the kitchen at 6:45 a.m. youll be greeted by your favorite mug, a batch of already brewed coffee (thanks, timer!), the box of cereal, and a bowl. So much better than rummaging around for coffee and filter, the cereal, and a bowl and mug while also trying to unload the dishwasher you ignored yesterday. More importantly, this helps cement the habit of eating breakfast at home, which is cheaper and healthier! than hitting the coffee cart or the fast-food drive-through on your way to work. 18. Set up reminders. Cody, the young-and-hustling author of the FlyToFI blog, uses his iPhones Reminders app to avoid errors as simple as forgetting to buy milk, or as potentially life-changing as failing to change the batteries in the smoke detector. This app, or any other reminders system, can save you money in the here-and-now, such as avoiding no-show fees for missed medical appointments. Reminders also help you stay on top of things that keep you financially healthy. Its so easy to think, I really should [look for a better rewards card/get scheduled auto maintenance done/buy life insurance] and then not do these things. If thats you, then set reminders. Re-set them if necessary. Sooner or later (preferably sooner) youll make Future Yous needs a priority. Award-winning journalist and veteran personal finance writerDonna Freedmanis the author of Your Playbook for Tough Times: Living Large on Small Change, for the Short Term or the Long Haul and Your Playbook for Tough Times, Vol. 2: Needs AND Wants Edition. More byDonna Freedman: https://www.thesimpledollar.com/18-two-minute-chores-you-should-never-put-off/